How to Begin Planning Care for an Aging Parent

1. Begin with their preferences

Before discussing providers or living arrangements, ask:

• What parts of your routine would you most like to keep?
• Is there anything you would welcome help with?
• What concerns you about accepting support?
• Who would you like involved in these conversations?

The goal is a shared conversation—not a decision made around someone rather than with them.

2. Write down practical priorities

Create a short list of the everyday tasks your family wants to discuss. These might include meal preparation, transportation, companionship, household chores, or personal care.

Separate what your parent has requested from what others have noticed. Bring health-related questions to an appropriate healthcare professional rather than trying to resolve them through a family checklist.

3. Make family responsibilities specific

Instead of saying “we will all help,” agree on manageable tasks.

One person might organize questions. Another could research local services. Someone else might coordinate a weekly family check-in.

Include relatives who live farther away if your parent wants them involved. They may be able to help with research or organization even when they cannot visit regularly.

4. Prepare questions before contacting providers

When contacting providers in your area, useful questions include:

• Do you serve our specific ZIP code?
• What services do you provide, and what is outside your scope?
• What availability and minimum-hour requirements apply?
• What are the full costs, including additional fees?
• Who provides the care, and who supervises or coordinates it?
• What credentials, licensing, and insurance can we verify?
• What happens if our needs or schedule change?

Request written information so your family can compare options without relying on memory. Confirm current pricing and availability directly with each organization.

5. Choose one next step

Your next step might be a family conversation, a list of provider questions, or a discussion with a qualified professional.

Write down who will handle it and when you will check in again. Leave room to adjust the plan as your parent’s preferences and circumstances change.